Coupon Bandits

Monday night I was out until after midnight. Did I get a wild hair to throw caution to the wind, put on my LBD, and go out dancing with my husband? Not exactly.

I went couponing.

Confession. I have never used a coupon in my adult life. When I was in high school, my mom dated a guy named Joe. Joe wouldn’t leave the house unless he had a coupon for it. He would take my mom, my sister and I out to dinner (with a coupon of course) and pray before every meal, “Lord, lead us to bargains.” We would roll our eyes and kick each other under the table. Ever since then I thought that people who used coupons were just cheap. Well…. pride goeth, right? While the rest of my family was all snug in their beds Monday night, there I was with my girlfriend Martha clipping coupons in the parking lot at Harris Teeter.

Martha, has turned coupon clipping into an art form. She has a 3-ring binder with dividers labeled by food groups, and coupons filed in plastic baseball card sleeves. She can walk into the supermarket and purchase $50 worth of groceries for $10! I asked her to teach me her tricks, so she and I sat in my van staking out the place with our binders full of coupons plotting how we were going to rob the place blind. Cheese, pasta, taco seasoning….. FREE FREE FREE! It felt like we were stealing.

When we got to the register and discovered that I had saved over $60 with my coupons, I thought Howie Mandel himself was going to jump out from the canned meats aisle at any moment and tell me that I had just won the million dollar case. I was elated! I’m surprised the cashier didn’t say that there was a sale on aisle 13 for those looking to get a life, but he just smiled unsuspectingly as we made it out of the store with our loot.

I came home to a tired husband who met me outside to help me unload the get away car. He laughed as I laid out all of the groceries and pulled out my camera.

I just had to prove it to myself. I don’t think I’ve spent 100 bucks on groceries since I was single and eating Ramen.

Just in case you are entertaining the idea of doing something scandalous, check out Southern Savers for coupons and deals in your area! I’m seriously considering ironing my bed sheets next just for kicks. I know… I’m a wild woman!

1 Comment

  1. Sherry said,

    February 25, 2011 at 3:24 am

    There’s a lady who goes through every grocery ad, coupon insert, etc for Charlotte and publishes a giant list – she has a blog on the Observer’s site now: I thought she showed some serious dedication to frugality, but you and Martha may give her a run for her money!

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